Cultural Clashes: Mom's Visit to Finland

My mom spent almost 3 weeks in Finland with us and it was quite a ride. I'm thankful for the opportunity, because she's not getting any younger and coming here is such a loooooong journey. She was amazed at how bright it was during the nights and in Lapland she said that the sky felt so close (close enough to make her feel like she could grab the clouds with her bare hands LOL!). She enjoyed good weather for two full weeks (sunny and warm, about 20'C), but then the temperature took a dive and it was rainy/grey for the last week. The good thing about this was that she got to see some autumn colours (mostly some yellow colours). She also got a few chances to see some reindeer in Lapland, so that was cool, too. 

One thing I realized during her visit was that I had taken so many things for granted. There are so many things that have become my new normal that I hadn't anticipated telling/explaining to her. Case in point: the day before she was supposed to fly back to Indo, she asked me why the toilet sprayer (the small spray for your private parts next to the toilet) didn't work well whenever she used it. I had forgotten that back home at her place, her toilet sprayer wasn't connected to the sink, so it would automatically spray water whenever you press the handle. However, here in Finland all the toilet sprayers are connected to the sink, so you have to open the tap at the sink first before you're able to use the toilet sprayer. What surprised me (and made me slightly amused) was the fact that it took her that long to ask me that.

Other than those pragmatic daily stuff (like how to use the stove, how to use the shower, how to open/close the blinds, etc.), lots of cultural differences also appeared. Here are a list of things I can think of right now:

1. Sauna

During the good weather period, I introduced my mom to MIL's sauna in another village. That sauna uses firewood, so I thought it would be a different experience for her. The first time we were there, the weather was so gorgeous and warm, so I told my mom she could just take a bath there in the sauna if she didn't want to stay there too long. She did take a bath, but she said it was way too hot for her. When the weather became cooler, my mom said it was so cold that she didn't want to shower. So I offered her to warm up the sauna at our place. I told her to go inside before the sauna got too hot, so this time she managed to enjoy the sauna experience better. The next time I was warming up the sauna, she was more than ready to jump inside, especially because the weather was cold. So in the beginning she didn't understand the benefits of the sauna at all (esp. when the weather was gorgeous outside), but once it became colder, she began to enjoy going there. 

2. Crossing the Streets

We spent some time in Helsinki with my mom (we ourselves rarely go to Helsinki because it's a long journey from here and it's not cheap to travel in Finland) and in the beginning the way she was crossing the street was Indonesian style. As long as the streets looked empty, regardless of the light, she would automatically start to move forward LOL! 

3. Clearing Your Own Table At Some Places

We spent a day in Rovaniemi at a hotel that offered free breakfast and in that hotel, guests were asked to clear their own table. There were designated places for utensils, bowls, etc. In some cafes in the airport as well, there are usually carts where people can put away their trays. These things were new for my mom. 

4. Seeing Drunk People

My mom was surprised to see some drunk people in the streets/at some parks. In Indonesia, drinking alcoholic drinks isn't customary and you rarely see drunk people in public places in broad daylight (perhaps only at some bars during the wee hours of the day).

I had something else to add to this list, but it has escaped me at the moment. I'll write it down when I remember it later. Here are some photos of us in a collage. The bottom middle pic is when my mom tasted my homemade reindeer meat. :-D

3BT: Random Days

1. Yesterday I managed to book plane tickets for my mom. WHOOOOPPPEEE!!! Very impressed with KLM customer service on FB, since they have quick response and they help me out very promptly. I hope my mom stays healthy and everything goes out well. I've ordered wheelchair assistance for her since she's had some knee problem and it's her first time travelling solo. Plus she only speaks basic English. EXCITTTINNNGGG!!! 

Thank you as well to Juliana who's advised me to get this type of wheelchair assistance for my mom to make things more easily for her.

2. We had a lovely winter holiday in Prague. The weather wasn't that hot yet, but it enabled us to walk a lot every day. One day we even covered 18 km.

3. Here are some views of Prague as well as some silly photos of me in Madame Tussaud museum he he he...

3BT: Random Days

1. Went aurora chasing two days after the previous post's big aurora, but that time the aurora wasn't as strong, so I couldn't capture the photos too well even though I had my camera and small tripod with me. However, I did manage to see reddish colour and I could see the progression of when the aurora started dancing right above the horizon before it moved further up to above my head. Here's a collage of the not-so-good photos (but at least you can see the crazy shapes the aurora can make).

2. Hubby managed to take a day off, so we went for a weekend trip to Levi and had a relaxing time there.

3. I've booked a massage for preparation to go back to work. Work is going to be super hectic during the first two weeks of the store being re-opened after the renovation, so I feel that I need a fit body for that.

4. I'm planning to send my mom to Finland next year for a visit and this thought is really exciting for me. The only thing we both need to secure first is a permission from our bosses to have the holiday at the same time as my mom's visit he he he...since she can't handle the cold, it has to be in summer.

5. Finding ginger candies at a supermarket in Levi. They're exactly like the ones I like from Indo, so even though they're expensive, I bought two packs of them HA HA HA HA...

P.S. Here's another one of the aurora photos taken with my camera (I don't have any wide lens, so can only capture bits and pieces).

 

Movie Memory: Moulin Rouge

You know how finding old songs can bring out a certain memory or flashback, right? Well, the other day I was suddenly in the mood to listen to a song in Moulin Rouge again and it brought me back to the past. I saw the movie with my mom at the cinema. I used to be able to go out with my mom every now and then, treat her food or go to the cinema with me. This was one of the movies that she liked. Yep, not all of the movies I took her to were her taste (though she always let me decide) ha ha ha ha ha...If she didn't really like the movie, she didn't complain, but she'd fall asleep in the middle of it LOL!!! Funny how seeing her fall asleep on the chair reminded me of my grandma (her mom) dozing off so many times on the couch. Whenever we told her to lie down in bed, she'd refuse and pretend that she wasn't sleeping, though every single time she'd fall right back to sleep on the couch ha ha ha ha...

Anyway, I saw Moulin Rouge with my mom but during the last scene my bladder was screaming like crazy. I had no idea how much longer the movie was going to be and the toilet was a bit far away, but I took a chance because I was afraid there'd be a long queue if I waited until the movie ended (as what usually was the case). When I came back, I found out that I had missed the climax. Doh! My mom had to tell me what was going on. She said it was a good story. :-D 

Any movie/song memory you'd like to share with me?

Here's one lovely song from the movie: 

Wet Christmas + Letter Update

I worked on Christmas eve and after that we went to get MIL and then we went to the graveyard. The temperature was still below zero that day (but not too cold), so Winter Wonderland was still intact. We lit some candles in front of FIL's graves and MIL brought some leaves to decorate it. Here are some pictures taken in the new cemetery and the old cemetery. There were lots of people and there were already so many candles everywhere. 

 

Christmas Day was really wet. Until today the temperature has been above 0'C, so it's been really slippery and wet out there. What a weird end of the year! So much of the snow has melted away and it gets SO dark outside. If the weather prediction is right, the temperature will be below zero again only after New Year. We shall see about that. This is my first time experiencing December like this (including some watery rain). Usually at this time of the year there's at least as much snow as in the photos above.

Anyway, I had a funny story from work. I had an evening shift on 23rd and before work started, I had told myself to remember saying "Hyvää Joulua" (Merry Christmas) at the end of each transaction. OK, so everything went well for a few hours until one time I was serving a guy and after that I said, "Kiitos (thank you)" but instead of saying Merry Christmas, I said "Hyvää viikonloppua" (Have a good weekend) instead. Yep, I managed to wish someone a good weekend on a MONDAY!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...Well, at least my mistake managed to make the guy and the customer behind him smile. LOL LOL!!! 

Anyway, I had fun again tricking hubby with the Christmas gift. This time I wrapped one of the gifts three times with some wrapping paper (it wasn't a big gift, so I didn't have to use too much paper) and then I wrapped it with some bubble wrap and then I put it inside a bigger box along with the other gift and then I wrapped it with some wrapping paper again. Watching him struggle to be able to see what was inside the gift was WORTH IT! WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! :-D :-D :-D

In this post I'd also like to say that I've finally written down the letter for my mom. It was bittersweet to write. I ended up writing a 4-page MS Word document (plus one paragraph on the 5th page with font size 12 Times New Roman). I know it's going to be overwhelming for her to read, but I want her to know what we've been through because I hope that she'll take comfort in the knowledge that God has healed our bleeding wounds and dried them up and He has used our pains to comfort others in a similar situation. So PRAISE THE LORD for our infertility!!! 

I haven't heard anything from my mom yet, but I know she needs time to digest everything and calm herself down (bro said that she was crying after reading the letter). Bro helped me explain to her what kind of support I needed from her - bless him! I've sent her a text to let her know that she's appreciated and loved. I hated the fact that I had to send the letter (I thought about it for weeks before finally writing it down), but I feel that it's important for us both that she knows how far we've come. I want her to be released from the burden of thinking and praying for our miracle pregnancy, because that's not what we want anymore. We've buried that dream and I want her to do the same. I want her to be happy for our little family.

An Important Letter

I'm in the middle of composing an important letter in my head. I'm going to transfer it to text later. You see, if you're a regular reader, you've probably known that we've decided to surrender to life without kids. After spending a few years trying to conceive and thinking that family = husband + wife + a kid (a few kids), it took A LOT of energy and a long winding healing process to finally switch to thinking that a complete family = me + hubby. My huge hole in the heart has dried up and we've been content with what we have (read: meaning on most days, we can focus more on what we have and be thankful for what we have instead of the hole in our hearts, though there are tender moments here and there). 

During our infertility journey, I've told my mom succinctly about our decisions and every time she seemed to be supportive. Last summer during our holiday, mom wrote me an SMS saying, "Last year on your birthday I woke up early in the morning and sent a prayer to God so that you'd be pregnant. Instead your SIL got pregnant." 

I was shocked when I read that SMS. I told her about our decision to live life without kids already three years ago and back then she said it was a good decision, but last year she was still praying like that? Mind you, I AM thankful that I have a mother who prays for me, but I find that it's rather useless to pray for someone to get something that the person in question doesn't want anymore (that the person in question doesn't even try to get anymore). What's the use for that? I know that I can't control what she hopes for us and I KNOW damn well she means well, but nevertheless I felt sad and upset when I read her SMS. Why? Because what she thinks will make us happier only makes me feel that what we have right now is not enough.


The world is already so full of reminders of our losses and we need all the support we get to live the kind of life that we've chosen. In the past I had some guilt over the fact that I couldn't give my parents any grandchildren, but I've learnt to get rid of the guilt...but I haven't actually told her about this kind of guilt. I'm planning to tell her about this guilt so that she knows how hard it was. Choosing this path hasn't been easy and I need all the support I can get. If the person saying those words isn't my mom, I won't even consider trying to explain all these to her/him, but because I'm still going to keep in touch with my mom, I need and want her to understand my situation better.

You see, a few weeks ago I was talking to mom on Skype and she told me that a long-distance relative of hers came for a visit. When the auntie saw my wedding photos, she realized that I had married a foreigner, so she asked my mom the usual stuff (where I live etc.)

Auntie: "Does she have kids?"
Mom: "Not yet, because she postponed it and used birth control pills."
Auntie: "Oh yeah, I also know someone who used birth control pills to postpone having children and after that they had trouble conceiving. They finally had a child after four years of trying."

Again I was shocked when I listened to the story. I know that my mom didn't just tell me the story for no reason. So she was more or less blaming me for the use of birth control pills? And does that mean she still hopes for a miracle pregnancy? I'm always thankful to have a mom like my mom and I admire her for many different reasons, but I'm struggling with how to tell her gently about all these things (where do I start, how much should I divulge, etc.?). The reason why I finally thought about writing her all these stuff is because next year we're planning to visit Indonesia and I just don't want to hear these kinds of words coming out of her mouth anymore. These kinds of words don't help us in any way whatsoever.



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OK, change topic...I think this is going to be a very memorable Christmas for me because of many reasons. :-D :-D :-D First of all, the gift I sent to someone who was such a heaven sent years ago was welcomed with open arms. I really love people who can not only give, but also receive with open arms. Secondly, I calculated my budget and I made a last-minute order of extra gift for hubby which I hoped will make him smile. Thirdly, at first we thought it would be such a quiet Christmas with just the two of us, but turned out MIL could still enjoy it with us here, so WHOOOOOOPPPPEEEEE for that! :-D Fourthly, I sent something to someone which again I hope will make that person smile. Last but not least, I'm VERY THANKFUL I have enough budget to do all of the above and that I still have a job despite the tough economy. THANK YOU, Lord, for allowing me to do all these things. 


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Blast from the Past: How My Parents Met

Back in my parents' generation, most Chinese parents would be agitated when their daughters became "of age" (18 years old). The parents then would start trying to find "best matches" for their daughters. That was what happened with my mom's elder sisters. It's not like they were married off to strangers, mind you. If the daughters weren't interested, then they wouldn't force the marriage, but anyway, many young girls back then were already married by the time they reached 20 years of age. 

My parents were the exception. I think for dad the problem was that he was shy and he didn't come from a well-off family. After all, in a developing country where there were almost no social benefits available, the man's ability to provide for the family became an important thing, especially because back then most women became stay-at-home moms. So having "rich" parents would help a man become "more interesting" for prospective women so to speak.

In my mom's case, she was just not interested in all the men that tried to pursue her (most of them were relatives or long-distant relatives) and back then my mom had an ambition. The ambition was to save enough money to buy grandma (her own mother) a house because at that time grandma was staying with my mom's elder sister and they kept on quarreling with each other. FYI, my mom's wish came true in the end. :-D


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Anyway, my parents met through a mutual friend. This woman became their "matchmaker" so to speak. Mom was 31 at that time whereas dad was 35. They dated for 6 months and then decided to get married 6 months from then. So they got married about a year after they first met. And I was born exactly 10 months to the date of their wedding day. That's why it's easy for me to remember their wedding day ha ha...

Mom told me that when she started dating dad, she warned her mother and her elders NOT to try to do some "research" on my dad's background. You see, back then if there was a prospective husband-to-be, apparently my mom's elders loved to do some research to find out where the guy lived (in Indo even until now it's normal for kids to stay with their parents until they marry - so if they're not married, it's normal for them to stay home forever if they want to), who the parents were, what the financial condition of the parents and the guy was, etc. 

And I suspect that this kind of "habit" was not just limited to my mom's elders, because when we were younger, we always heard from our parents that back in their days there was this slogan "Bibit Bebet Bobot". This slogan was used in order to find the best prospective spouse-to-be. Bibit means genes, but it can also include the family background (social strata). Bebet means the spouse-to-be's circle of friends (are his friends gangsters or what?), though it also sometimes includes where he lives because sometimes where you live shows how well-off you are. Bobot means the spouse-to-be's personality and social status (job, rank, intelligence). 

Back to my parents...my mom actually knew my dad's younger brother because they went to school together. One important aspect that mom said made her believe that my dad would be a suitable husband was that while they went on dates and they talked about stuff, she found out that they had similar principles, goals, and aspirations. She knew that dad would be someone who could walk together with her hand-in-hand through life's ups and downs. And those words have been etched in my mind ever since I was young. :-) Finding someone who can walk together hand-in-hand (not just literally but mentally) was also my goal in terms of finding a husband. :-) 


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I don't think that they started off with romance, though (not love at first sight or things like that). Considering their ages, it was more of a sensible option, I suppose, though I'm sure love and romance grew from there. One of my fave memories of them is hearing them laugh and giggle like crazy until it got hard to breathe and mom said that she was afraid of peeing in her pants - you know the kind of laughter that started and then subdued for a few seconds but then it started again and again and again (this happened a few times: sometimes behind closed door, sometimes while they were both watching TV). 

My parents had a double wedding parties in two different places. Back then the cost of a wedding isn't as crazy as these days, so my dad had a wedding party where he invited all his relatives and friends in one place and after that my mom had hers where he invited all her relatives and friends. That way each of them could have a wedding that they wanted in two different places and invited whomever they wanted to invite he he...Such a tiring day, wouldn't you say? I loved looking at their wedding albums, though. :-)

Back then (few hundred) guests brought gifts instead of money for the newlyweds, so you can imagine that on their wedding night, they spent the whole night opening all the gifts and reading all the cards ha ha ha ha ha...and because they received plenty of similar gifts (lots of clocks and kitchen sets), they saved some of them to give to other newlyweds later on so that they didn't have to buy anything else LOL!!! 

Oh, before I forgot...I think one other reason why they expedited their wedding was because my dad's brother had been in a relationship for a few years already by the time my parents met and he didn't want to get married before my dad got married. And due to the amount of guests invited per wedding, in Indo it's usually considered "bad" if two siblings get married the same year, because it means that the guests will have to shell out some money again to the same family the same year (it'll be sort of a burden for them 'coz after all, it's normal in Indo to get lots of wedding invitations every year, esp. if you know so many people and you have lots of relatives and friends). So my dad's younger bro got married a year after my parents got married. 

OK, I got carried away and told you about their wedding, even though this post was supposed to be only about how they met HA HA HA HA HA HA...never mind then! :-D
 

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Blast from the Past: Mom's History

My mom is the youngest of six children - actually seven if you counted one elder sister who died young due to some kind of disease. People kept saying that this sister was the most beautiful one of all. After my mom was born, grandma split up with grandpa. I don't think they had an official divorce, but they lived in different houses. Being a "dragon lady" (grandma had such a strong personality), grandma started selling food in the local market and due to this fact, she couldn't take care of the kids, so the kids were sent to relatives' places. My mom was taken by one relative whose daughter was almost the same age, so this cousin's mother breastfed my mom as well. They played together a lot* and only after my mom reached a certain age did she realize that she had blood siblings spread around in different places.

Grandma split up with grandpa because she couldn't handle his jealousy. Back then birth control had just started being promoted in Indo and because grandma was fed up of being pregnant and giving birth almost every year, she wanted to use some form of birth control, but grandpa wouldn't have it. He thought that it would give grandma "access" to "do it" with other men. He also got jealous at her whenever she dressed up and put on some makeup. 

Anyway, after some time the siblings decided to go back and live with my grandma. I don't know who made the decision, but finally the siblings lived in the same house with grandma. I'm pretty sure the siblings still kept in touch with grandpa as well, because when I was really young, I also went to visit grandpa, though I don't remember anything about it because grandpa died when I was still so small. All I remember of him came from a memory of his pic - he has white hair and a long white beard. Typical old Chinese man at that time he he...like in a kungfu movie (like in the pic below, but white). :-D In fact, we always referred to him as Grandpa Beard or Engkong Jenggot in Indo (seriously! I'm not making it up!).


All I know about grandpa was that he came from mainland China and then met my grandma. Grandma was born in Indo already, so she didn't speak Chinese. And grandpa was some sort of medicine man. When his second son (my uncle) couldn't have kids for years, grandpa made him some Chinese concoction and I suppose it worked for them 'coz afterwards he and his wife did go on to have two children of their own. 

Back to my mom's story...after the siblings went to live together with grandma again, they started helping her out. My mom would tell me how she had to get up early before going to school so that she could help out prepare the food to sell at the local market. That's why all the siblings (including mom's brothers) are able to cook great food, because they were born in a family that made a living by selling food. Even until her old age, grandma kept on selling food in the local market. Only after her health declined did she finally stop doing so. 

I'm not sure my mom's other siblings got a chance to get a proper education other than elementary school, but my mom finished High School and she did go to a university, but she stopped halfway because back then there were some communist activities in Indo and so she started focusing on earning money by selling food since then. So my mom never worked in a company or any other place. She's always been her own boss. :-D She has retired when my brother's son was born 'coz she's been helping take care of him, but every now and then some people who miss her food would still call her up and order some of her specialties. :-D


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Quite a childhood, no? But my mom grew up to be such an independent, mature, and stable woman, though she's not a feminist. Next time I'll talk a bit about my dad's childhood and how my parents met. :-D

* Even until now she's still close to that cousin of hers whose mother breastfed my mom, because they feel like sisters in a way, I suppose. :-D  

P.S. Grandma loved grandsons better than granddaughters (grandma lived with us for years until the day she died, so it was easy for me to observe her). I'm really glad that my parents aren't like that and that they treat me equally with my brother.

3BT: Random Days

1. It took a wooden splinter in my ankle and a sore back to remind me of how amazingly the body works when it's fully well. That it takes so many muscles to move without pain when you try to get up from a lying down position and when you try to move around and change your positions. And the piece of wooden splinter reminds me of the fact that my body is still able to send me an "alarm" when something foreign is entering my body.

2. Yesterday hubby and I visited a couple of animals in captive, namely bears, a sleepy fox, and a lynx. I took some videos, but they have to wait until later. :-D Btw, I fell in love with the gorgeous lynx. :-D

3. We did go bowling and it was fun. :-D My first time ever!!! And I even accidentally scored a strike!!!! YEEEEAAAAHHHHH!!! :-D

4. Mirrow-like surfaces. They always take my breath away.

5. My Mom's going to visit some relatives with her sister and nieces. Glad to know she's going to have fun with them. :-D

6. Hot ginger-orange flavoured tea on a cool day. Mmmmmmmmm...

7. Getting along well with not only parents-in-laws but also BIL and SIL is a blessing. :-D
 

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3Doodler + Handicraft Lesson

I'm not really good making things (I feel more at ease writing stuff), but I still think this creation below is cool. 3Doodler. What do you think?



I remember when I was in elementary school we had a "handicraft" lesson and the teacher made us learn to create different things. What did I do? I got plenty of help from my Mom. I had no patience nor interest with that kind of lesson, whereas my Mom did. I remember at one point we had to make an Easter chick with wool. It's something like this: Easter Chick. 

I don't remember how old I was when I had to make it, but I remember getting some help from my Mom LOL!!!!! Even though I know that parents weren't supposed to help, but still I was stubborn enough to stop doing something if I didn't feel like it. 

I also remember having to make some "tapai" (peuyeum) in one class, but for some reason it didn't turn out too well, so my Mom told me to just buy some from a tapai seller and bring it to class LOL!! Each of us was supposed to bring our own homemade tapai and eat it together at school. The teacher asked us then if the ones we brought were our real homemade tapai (not bought) and I stayed silent. Sorry, teacher, but there was just no time to remake a new batch of tapai to bring to class he he he he...Ah, memorieessss! :-D 

Childhood Memory: Glutinous Rice Balls in Ginger Soup

When we were younger, we used to help Mom prepare some glutinous rice balls. On certain days of the year, she'd try to sell lots of these at the traditional market where she made a living. Making glutinous rice balls in ginger soup itself isn't that hard, but when you're trying to sell at least dozens of bags of them (a bag would consist of 20-25 balls), it can be a tough task, especially for children.

Here's a recipe that I found online: Glutinous Rice Balls in Ginger Soup. The ones we made were without fillings, so they'd be smaller than those in this pic and my Mom would use food colouring to make different types: chocolate (using chocolate powder), white (original colour), pink, and green (using a dash of red and green food colouring). 


Anyway, one day my Mom asked for our help to make hundreds and hundreds of these balls (she never forced us to help, mind you!). Being kids, of course we were so excited to help. Who wouldn't? Even Ken, my bro's son, loves helping out. In fact, today he did make these balls as well - that was what prompted me to write this post hi hi...But now that my Mom has retired, she doesn't have to make too many balls anymore. Just enough for the family and to give out to some relatives. 

Let's zoom back to the past, shall we? Anyway, Mom had separated the four colours in different bowls and she told us to pick which colours we wanted. Being the youngest one in the family, my brother was the slowest one because his hands were smaller than ours. At first he was so excited, but after some time had passed by, after watching how fast the others (me, Dad, and esp. Mom) managed to make the balls, he started comparing how much dough we had left in our own bowls. After realizing that he had the most dough still, he got stressed out and he started crying. He bawled and said, "I'm never going to finish this!!!!!!!!!"

Poor boy...Mom finally let him stop and take a rest and she took the dough that was given to him and continued making the balls efficiently. In the future after this incident, whenever we gathered together to help Mom make more balls, we'd remember it fondly (well, except perhaps my bro who would probably wish everybody else had forgotten about it LOL!!!).

Family Ties

I feel like I've lived in quite a "safe bubble" my entire life. When I was younger, my parents would take me to school and pick me up again from there. I was only allowed to start using the public transit when I was 12 y.o. However, my Dad still insisted on taking us to school before he went to work anyway. When I was in High School Dad bought a secondhand car from his younger sister on installment, so he took us to school by car, though starting in Junior High we could go back home by public transit ourselves.

When I went to university, my Dad still sometimes took me there because at that time he had started working as an insurance agent, so his working hours were pretty flexible. Even the parking guy at the university remembered my Dad's face because he took me there many times over. When my brother started going to the same university (different faculty, though), sometimes he'd give me a ride if our schedule matched. :-)

After graduation, I continued working as a part-time English tutor and then I started having the job as a translator. Then after a while I decided that I was fed up being an English tutor and I wanted to try working in a company. An opportunity came and I was invited for an interview. The factory where I had to have the interview couldn't be reached by public transit, so my Dad took me there - and my Mom and brother went along with me because they wanted to support me and because they were so curious about it all (it was my first job interview ever anyway) HA HA HA HA HA HA...

P.S. Unfortunately I didn't enjoy the job, so I quit after only being there for 7 weeks and from then on I focused my time on translating books instead. 

Maybe it's such an embarrassing thing for some people, but for me, it wasn't embarrassing. Maybe because I'd been having this dream of travelling abroad and even living abroad since I was a child, so I always had this thought in my mind, "They can't keep doing it for me when I'm far away, so I may as well just let them love me this way while we still live together." After all, by then I was already in love with R2 and I was thinking that if our relationship worked out, I would definitely have to leave Indo.  



Anyway, the first time I started teaching in an English course at the university at around 19 y.o., my parents took me there. They just wanted to know where the course was. One of my lecturers recruited me to teach at her English course (the course was open for kids from the age of 5 to 12 y.o.), so she had told me to come there at a certain time and date. When my parents and I arrived there, she wasn't there yet, but the secretary was there. Mind you...I had Demi Moore's hair in Ghost at that time (and I'm only 145 cm)...upon seeing me with my parents, the secretary greeted us and immediately asked, "Oh, are you here to enroll in one of our English courses?" LOL LOL LOL!!!

Imagine her surprise when she found out I was there to TEACH!!!!! ROFL ROFL ROFL...anyway, I'm glad I have so many memories of being with my parents and I'm REALLY thankful for their efforts in spending time with me. My Mom also accompanied me every time I had to go to Jakarta to apply for my visa and when I had to prepare for the paperwork before I could get married with R2 as well as the paperwork after I got married before I could move to Finland. My family's not perfect and my parents aren't big on saying "I love you" or "I'm proud of you" and they're not even big on hugs, but I never doubt their love for me because of the way they lavish us with their time, attention, and support. After all, quality time is my primary love languages.

Ah, my cup is overflowing with gratitude...


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3BT: Random Days

1. Writing this note for hubby (I had an evening shift that day): "Just eat me all up 'coz your wife is going to cook something else tomorrow, OK? Signed: The Slaughtered Lamb. :-D" ---> I had cooked some lamb the day before and there was some left in the fridge, but I knew that he would be worried whether he should eat it all up or leave me a little piece of it, so I stuck the note on top of the box containing the lamb meat. I'm glad to know the note made him smile. :-D Hubby, you INSPIRE me!

2. Had a brilliant idea to trick hubby again on Christmas. ROFL ROFL!!! I'll write about it later on after Christmas if it works!!! I'm just SOOOOO excited!!!



3. Bro told me he woke up earlier specially on my birthday to say a prayer for me. My heart melted!!!

4. My Mom sent me a bday SMS and she also sent prayers. THANKS A LOT, Mom!

5. My closest friends send me birthday greetings and them really touched me deeply and one of them made me laugh by writing down how we first met. :-D More mushy mushy feelings...

6. Watching the frozen snowflakes on my bike saddle and bag when the temperature outside was about -20'C. Amazing artwork!!!


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7. Falling in love with characters in books/stories/movies...ahhhhh...I know they're not real, but there are just so many unreal things that are so adorable he he...

3BT: Random Days

1. I almost dropped a doughnut while taking it out of the bag. R2 and I were sitting in the kitchen at that time, about to drink coffee. I saw R2 smiling after I almost dropped the doughnut. 

Me: "Hey, don't smile 'coz I almost dropped the doughnut!"
R2: "I'm not smiling 'coz of that. I'm smiling 'coz I'm happy. After all, I have you!"
Me: (awwwwwwing inside) "Unfair! That's an unexpected response!" (smile)

2. Made some banana-chocolate pastries for my coworkers which became a hit (and I could share with them how easy to make it, too). Glad to know they liked 'em! :-D

Recipe: a box of frozen pastry (mine has 5 sheets of frozen pastries), some bananas, and some chocolate. Let the frozen pastry out in warm temperature until it's soft, then cut them into thin strips (around 2.5 cm wide) then cut a banana in half. Wrap the half banana with the pastry strip diagonally until it's all covered. Do it until you're out of pastry and bananas. Bake them in the oven until they're golden brown. Let them cool off for a while. Then melt some chocolate (I prefer dark chocolate around 200 grams) with a little butter and smear it on top of the pastries. All done! :-D Result: 10 banana-chocolate pastries.

3. A customer saying nice stuff to me that made my eyes wet. BLESS YOU, each and every single one of you! I'm REALLY blessed by your words!


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4. Talking to Mom on Skype after she got back from Taiwan with her friend. Glad to know she had fun and that she only felt a little unwell once during a bus trip but after taking some anti motion sickness pill, she felt much better.

5. The very slow translating project I'm doing for a customer is nearing its end. Only about 20 pages left, though I still have the big task of editing my translation, but it's always nice to know that a project is almost ending. :-D It feels like almost completing a marathon (not that I've ever been in one, though).

6. Being able to enjoy Winter Wonderland scenery this month already. Even though the snow has mostly melted now, but it was such a treat!

7. Start listening to Christmas songs already....HO HO HO HO HOOOHHHH...

3BT: Random Days

1. Having a laid back hubby who doesn't even complain when I couldn't cook him regular meals or clean up the house due to my flu.

2. The sore throat is finally seeming to go away (fingers crossed!). The past few weeks of having horrible sore throat reminds me of how LOVELY it is NOT to feel any pain on the throat! I still have no appetite but at least no more sore throat! YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!


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3. Watching hubby crazily mimicking Morgana's evil grins (from Merlin TV series). SO FUNNY! ;-D

4. I begged hubby to make some pancakes and he did make some. :-D *spoiled brat alert*

5. My Mom's finally booked the trip with her friend to go to Taiwan for a week. It makes me happy to see her able to enjoy her golden days 'coz I can just imagine how excited she is. :-D

6. Last Sunday for some reason I had some pain on the chest and I had more trouble breathing while lying down (my throat felt half blocked due to phlegm but no matter what I tried, I couldn't let the phlegm out) and hubby was so worried. And I'm SO glad the pain didn't continue and the next day it didn't happen again! That was REALLY scary!

Oh, and I'm ESPECIALLY THANKFUL that I didn't get this sick during our holiday!!!!!!!!!!!!

7. My dear friend who's moving with her family to Rovaniemi gave me one of their old kicksleds. THANK YOU SO MUCH for the gift!!! I'm gonna MISS YOUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!


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3BT: Random Days

1. MIL has been able to drive her car again. Nice to see her more mobile 'coz the other week she felt down because she had been unable to go out too much after her surgery.

2. An honest customer who saved my day!!! May the Lord bless you for your honesty!

3. Hubby's funny jokes. :-D

4. Compassionate people all around me.

5. Triple-glazed windows that really help cut down the traffic noise from the street (it's only noticeable once we open a window and realize how much noise we can hear from out there without the closed windows).

6. My Mom may be going on a holiday with some of her friends who are her age later on and I'm just THANKFUL that she still has that possibility.

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3BT: Random Days

1. Getting 3 new novels (they're on a discount). Best of all, hubby paid for them HUA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA...

2. Seeing two reindeer close-up while riding my bike from MIL's place today. They were busily eating while I took pics from a few metres away. :-D

3. Mom's told me that a relative of hers wants her to go with her on a trip. I'm glad to know that they're able to do such a thing in their old age.

4. Making chili tuna puff pastry again 'coz we both love 'em SO much (easy to make, too - I just need to buy a can of super delicious chili tuna and a bag of frozen puff pastry, defroste the pastry, then arrange the tuna on top of it and just shove 'em in the oven until they're golden brown. No need to add any more spices 'coz it's the right combo already). 

5. Finding some answers to some of the questions that have been bothering me for a while. :-D YAAAAYYY for enlightenment!!!

6. Went to bed later than R2 and when I came to bed, he turned around and held my hand. :-D

7. Delicious ice-cream on a special offer. Yum yum...:-D 

3BT: Random Days

1. Enlightenment. The other day I felt something that bothered me and I found the answer(s) soon enough. Felt totally relieved!

2. Hubby didn't have to go to another town in the middle of the night (cancelled job task).

3. Finding some books that resonate so much with what I've been thinking/feeling for the past year or so. I feel like nodding and nodding and nodding when reading them. And they give me more reflective passages, too! It's AWESOME to feel understood by someone you've never even met! :-D

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4. Genuine smiles from customers.

5. A little girl who's barely able to talk calling me, "Täti" (Auntie) a few times when the mother had finished paying and the mother laughed in glee.

6. My Mom's health, which was problematic a while back, is now improving slowly but surely.

7. Listening to a certain addictive song over and over and over again. *GRIN*

8. Soon it'll be our 5th wedding anniversary and the surprise gift that I've ordered arrived today. I've packed it and put it right on his computer desk and I can't wait for him to come home. I LOVE teasing him like this!!!! :-D I'll let him choose between opening it today or later on November 3rd hi hi hi...



9. Craving for the same food at the exact same moment as R2. :-D

10. The light therapy lamp has really helped me in dealing with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) 'coz for the past few days, I've felt that SAD has struck me full-force again.

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11. Going to visit a friend whom I haven't met in a few months. YAAAAYYYY!!! Girl talk!!! :-D

A Mother's Prayer

The other day I called my Mom through Skype and she told me one other prayer she had for us (her kids). She had told me one prayer she had for us when she was in labour room. She said that she prayed that God would help smoothen our paths each step of the way, but I never knew she had another prayer all these years he he he...

The second one is that she prayed for a "normal" life for us without any huge "gap" between us - for example she wouldn't wish that one of us would become so rich whereas the other one could be so poor. She just want us to have enough of everything. And I must say that so far her prayers have come true.

Most of all, I'm SO VERY thankful for having a praying mother who loves us equally, who listens to us, who understands us, who supports our decisions, who guides us without forcing her wishes upon us, who doesn't make us feel guilty about anything (including her sacrifices). And I can't wait to meet her and the rest of my family and friends again sometime soon in Indo!!!! Yep, counting down to our Indo trip he he he...

3BT: Random Days

1. Taking a nap together with hubby or sleeping together with him is pure bliss.

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2. Having met two close friends whom I hadn't met in real life in 5 years (one has been friends with me since we were 14, the other one has been friends with me since we were 16).

3. Having one of those two friends confirming what I had felt all along: that my MIL reminds me of my own mother.

4. Having a part-time job that allowed me to spend as much time as possible with my friends.

5. Not having to cook too much the week when my friends were here (I only cooked reindeer meat once) and being able to enjoy my friend's delicious dishes and cakes and biscuits. :-D

6. PERFECT weather during their stay. Couldn't have asked for more!

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7. One of those two friends confirmed to me that I had grown into a much more relaxed person. It's nice to have confirmation about such a thing.

8. The roses in the garden bloomed and they smelled WONDERFUL.

9. Getting another's POV enables me to see things through their eyes and thus allowing me to appreciate more what I have.

10. Receiving so much foodstuff from my two friends. They have packed so much Indo food and goodies in their suitcases. Yum yum...

11. Having a private BBQ with hubby the other day and then during the afternoon I cooked delicious Indo food using the food stuff that my friends brought me.

12. Colder days after such hot days and the rain was such a bliss 'coz then it means my whole garden got free water (which is the best water for them anyway according to MIL).

13. Today is my last work day of the week, which means I'll have more time to blog and do other stuff from tomorrow. YEAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

14. Finding easy basic belly dancing exercises in youtube which I could follow pretty well. I'm gonna try them again tomorrow. :-D

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