3BT: Random Days

1. Cutting nails right after shower, when the nails are still moist and soft. :-D

2. Good nail cutters.

3. A customer says she misses me whenever I'm not around. That's SO sweet of her to say that! :-D

4. Hubby gave me an early wedding anniversary gift: Wii Zumba complete with the belt. I tried it twice already hi hi hi...FUN! :-D

5. Bought these cheap, warm boots (15 Euros) for myself ---> self-pampering very early birthday gift (if I had waited until my bday, they'd have all been gone) ha ha ha ha ha...


6. This Thursday we'll be having our 5th wedding anniversary. Can't believe it's been 5 years already since we said our vows!!! THANKFUL for all the years we've been together and hoping for many more years to come he he...

7. This weekend we'll celebrate our wedding anniversary by going to the cabin again. WOOOHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! :-D Can't wait!!!

8. Mimicking hubby's silly expressions and words and poses and making him laugh. :-D

9. A friend asked for my opinion and I feel happy that she trusted me enough to ask for my opinion.

3BT: Random Days

1. Holding hubby from the back when he's sitting on the long kitchen bench. Feels SO GOOD to hold him like that!

2. Making a snowman in April HUA HA HA HA HA HA...I decorated the snowman using the bird seeds scattered on the ground under the bird feeders.




3. Looking at this: Such a WARM day!



4. Getting a CUTE compact new vacuum cleaner. It's VERY VERY light (unlike the old one), so I had no trouble getting it up and down the stairs HO HO HO HO HO...

5. Chatting with one of my best friends for about an hour today.

6. Not worrying about fresh water supply. The other week there was water trouble in my in-laws' place 'coz it seemed in that area the water pipes froze, so they couldn't get water for some time and that made me realize how much we take for granted the abundant fresh water supply.

7. Holding a child's hand while he was getting ready to take a nap - while listening to the teacher reading a story and getting a smile from him when I held his hand.

8. Hubby holding my hand when I was afraid to walk on some slippery ice towards the car in my in-laws' yard.

Psyching Up

Tomorrow is the dreaded interview day. I'm excited, but also getting giddy with the anticipation ha ha ha ha...I hope tomorrow morning comes ASAP so that I know what's going to happen next. Mind you that I'm NOT applying for a real job, so I'll just be helping out in the daycare if they decide to take me in - meaning I ain't gonna get any salary, but I'll get some money from the government.

Last night I had a talk with a friend who's out of her comfort zone - she quit her job after being there for 9 years and now she wants to try applying to be a teacher. She's never done that before and she's like a fish out of water, esp. when she realized that some teachers in the school had studied abroad and some of them are even native speakers. While talking to her, I realized this:

"Wouldn't it be MUCH better if we treat ourselves like we treat our best friends?"

glitter-graphics.com

While talking to this friend last night, I realized that we have the tendency to downplay our own abilities or even our own potential due to FEAR. We fear the unknown, we are afraid of looking like fools in a new environment where we don't know how well we can handle the pressure/challenges 'coz we have never been there. If I tell her about my insecurities, she'll tell me about the good sides I have to encourage me and if she tells me about her insecurities, I'll also do the same thing...but when do we become our own best friend? When do we pat ourselves on the back and inject ourselves with good, positive thoughts when we jump into an unknown zone? When do we stop making excuses about our lack of abilities and just DO IT?

Another thing I realize during our chat was that we sometimes care too much about what other people think and that puts a HUGE burden on our backs already EVEN before we try doing something new.

It's easy for us to be intimidated when we're in a new place and we look around the place and we see other people shining like "diamonds" and we feel so dirty, grimy, lackluster and we wonder if we can shine at all. I want to STOP feeling intimidated and just DO IT. I want to STOP comparing myself with others and if I'm given a chance to try, I want to just DO IT and see how far I can go. If I find myself not liking that particular field and not being good at it, at least I know that it's not where I belong and I can just try to find something else which would be more suitable for me.

I WANT to STOP making excuses for myself. I want to give myself a break for being a novice, for not knowing anything much, for making mistakes. I want to treat myself like I treat my own best friend. I want to give myself a pat on the back simply for trying and smile at my own reflection. You go, girl!!!

Introducing My Friend's Blog

I just want to introduce to you a blog created by one of my best friends from Indo. We've been friends for 17 years now, more than half our lives he he he...So why don't you visit her and welcome her to the blogosphere?

She studied medicine and used to work as a general practitioner in a hospital, but now that she has a young son to take care of, she decided to work as a part-time translator. Maybe later on she'll go back to work as a GP.

Here's her blog: The Journey of a Mom.

Welcome to the blogosphere, my friend! :-D

glitter-graphics.com

Kids?

Last weekend Arttu's brother spent two nights at our place. He asked me about kids. He said that in the family there were two grandkids of their eldest brother, so he was wondering if we could contribute in giving grandkids to their parents, too. He said that it was too late for him. He was already 40 years old and no sign of a steady girlfriend yet. When I told him that we would probably be planning on having a kid in the next 2 or 3 years to come, he said, "ALLRIGHT!" It was funny to see that he was excited about it.

Then a few nights ago I told my hubby that I was actually scared of having kids. I was scared 'coz I knew everything'd change tremendously. However, I said that I didn't want to wait too long since we wouldn't know how fast God would bestow us with a kid after we decided that we would try to have one anyway, right? He said he understood. Then I said to him that I was SO curious about what our kid would look like. He said he felt the same way. The short conversation made me feel GLAD. I'm glad knowing that he's probably ready in 2-3 years. I want him to be ready before I'm ready to have kids. I want us to work as a team when the kid arrives. I want him to be ready to face massive changes in our life.

Speaking of kids, I'm actually awed since I DO feel the longing to have kids right now. I used to be a tomboy when I was a kid. There was a time when I hated being a girl. Why? Because I knew girls could get raped and pregnant due to being raped. Thus I hated being a girl. It might sound silly, but that was what I felt back then.

I was one of those girls who "blossomed" late. I never felt too feminine. I hated wearing frilly dresses. I hated wearing a skirt. I hated the fact that I got my period early (at least it was considered early for my generation). I got my first period when I was around 10 years old. When all the other girls and boys could run and play freely, I had to use that thick, uncomfy, not-too-absorbent sanitary napkin. And back then I bled A LOT. I mean REALLY A LOT!!! I had trouble with it until High School (big and huge blood stains on the back of my uniform). Gladly the amount of blood's reduced A LOT over the years and nowadays there are SO MANY thin, super absorbent, comfy, winged sanitary napkins. HURRRRAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

Anyways, when I was in Elementary School, my Dad started the talk about "the most suitable age for girls to have kids". He thought that 25 was the ideal age to have kids. I've always been a rebellious person, so even then I countered him by saying, "I'll NEVER get married!" I remember my Dad panicking a bit, trying to tell me not to say such a thing HI HI HI...Yep, that's me!!! LOL!!!

Besides being tomboyish, among my close friends, I was the awkward one when it comes to being with kids. Most of them are so natural when they are around kids. So there was a time when I wondered if I would ever want to have kids. The answer came when one of my best friends got pregnant. She lived in Bandung, as well, so we kept on meeting each other almost every week or every second week. I was there during her pregnancy and when the baby was born, I visited her at the hospital with my Mom. That was the FIRST time in my life I felt something stirring inside me. Something akin to motherly instinct perhaps. It was the first time I wanted to have my own baby. It was one of those magical moments in my life when I felt SO feminine.

My other friends had had babies before that, but they never really made me want to have one. I don't know if it's due to the fact that I was there with that particular friend during her pregnancy (I saw all the USG pics and I could even touch her belly) or maybe it was just time for me to feel that instinct. I was simply speechless. It was MIRACULOUS!!! I still don't believe that the boy's now almost 2 years old and that he used to be as small as a peanut!!! Isn't it amazing?

Another thing that I've been worried about when it comes to having kids is how to teach them morality, religion, and all the good things in life. Seeing the state of the world today sometimes makes me feel scared of having kids. How do I know that I will raise good kids? How can I protect them from bad influences? How do I know how to set the limits for them?

Today I browsed through blogs and I found the answer that made me relieved. Jana from The Joy Box quoted her friend's words when she shared her worries about her daughter in her post entitled "Clay Under His Fingernails". Here's what God whispered to her:

"The clay of your daughter's being is under My fingernails. Love her as though you believe that and, in time, I will convince her of it. The world is groaning in pain. I plan on loving it, and I plan to do it in part through your daughter. I want you to take her out there, and introduce her to it. She's going to see and hear things that will break your mother's heart. And she's going to get hurt. But I'm preparing her for it now and I'm using you to help me. I can provide her with all the protection that is necessary when it's truly important (those times when you can't be there to do it), and wipe her tears better than you can. If I can use her for my purposes, I will bless her with joy that you cannot imagine. Are you going to trust Me?" (Kim in MO)

I sure do hope that one day God'll entrust me with my own kid or kids. When it comes to being a woman, now I'm GLAD I'm a woman since there's NO better feeling in the whole wide world when my man, lover, soulmate looks into my eye and tell me, "I love you. You're the best. You make me a better man." There's no better feeling than being a woman who's loved for who she is. Thus now I embrace my womanhood.

I LOVE BEING A WOMAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!

Ehem, OK, end of post before I get too excited. ;-D