Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Boundaries in Life

The past few days I've heard things that boil my blood and temper. I've heard how someone was mistreated. She made a decision to move her child to another school and someone else spread gossip about why she made that decision. The gossip tainted her reputation as someone who's unforgiving - the ABSOLUTE opposite of her temperament!!! She's one of the most forgiving and long-suffering people I've EVER known!

This person would be considered someone "too kind" - too soft-hearted to be aggressive when someone runs over her boundaries in life. I wanted to fight for her stepped-over boundaries, but I can't do that, can I? It's her life and she's the one who has to fight for it.

I just realized last night how important it is the ability to fight for our set-up boundaries in life and not to give in when people "demand" us to do something that we didn't really want to do simply 'coz we didn't want to hurt their feelings. It's not good if we let other people corner us with unnecessary guilt and outrageous demands, don't you think so?


I have this one question popping in my head the other day: Why does sometimes a pattern occurs in life? Is it because one's supposed develop more patience after one faces plenty of similar problems? Or is it because one's supposed to learn to BREAK the pattern?

I guess it all depends on the case and the "pattern", eh? Life, oh, life...

P.S. The other day I made a 2011 Calendar with "Images of Lapland":


5 comments:

  1. Hallos! It's true. As I grow older, I have come to realise that it's important to not to place too much importance on how people think of me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mel, I totally agree!!! Hans is most patient man on earth, I think, but sometimes he is too patient! Yes, there is such a thing as being too kind or too patient. Untungnya gw beda banget ama Hans.hahaha...kalo ada yg macem2, langsung gw datengin! hahahaha
    -_-' Your calendar is awesome!! WOW!!! Someone's talented! =D

    ReplyDelete
  3. WaterLearner: Hi, Karen! THANKS for sharing your POV and life's experience! :-D

    Shinta: He he he...too bad gua kaga bisa bantu temen gua itu dengan samperin orang yang ngegosipin dia...doh...biar Tuhan aja yang bales deh. Tapi betul, setuju soal bisa galak deh (galak tapi bener) hi hi hi...

    Anyway, THANKS for having browsed the calendar + for your encouragemtn! It was SO hard to try to pick the pics among thousands of pics that I've taken ha ha ha...

    ReplyDelete
  4. The patterns occur because we all have certain personality types. And each personality type makes you susceptible to certain things happening. Consider a few examples: There's a big, strong boy, but, sadly, he's not real smart. He's not a bully, but if someone were to hurt him or hurt one of his friends, he would beat them up. The problem pattern is that no one beats up this boy, but he's susceptible to being outsmarted and then the one tricking him laughs behind his back.
    Amel, another way to explain it is that we all have flaws. & sooner or later, someone will spot our flaw and take advantage of it.

    Life is tough sometimes. That's why it's great to have friends that add to one's insight & joy in life !

    ReplyDelete
  5. ChicagoWing: THANKS for sharing your POV. It does make sense what you said here. So if that's the case, we're supposed to break the pattern then...hopefully he he...

    And yeah, it's REALLY great to have wonderful friends. :-D

    ReplyDelete