Sunday, October 18, 2009

Crosses to Bear

When I found out that my FIL was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease about 2 years ago, I didn't know how it impacted my MIL. I figured it'd be hard on her (esp. since they've been together for over 45 years), but 'coz whenever we visit them, he always seems so functional and he always looks okay, I thought it was still okay.

Once or twice my MIL told us that she had trouble sleeping at nights 'coz FIL woke up during the night and went out. She also told us once that FIL peed in a bucket instead of in the toilet, so she even made a label on the toilet door. Other than that, though, I didn't know anything about her struggles.

Yesterday MIL asked us what to do to be able to comment on a "blog", 'coz it required registration or something like that. At first I was confused, 'coz usually if you want to comment on a blog, you don't need to register first as a user. When she showed us the webpage, I realized it was a forum for people who take care of their sick family member(s).

She found a thread about Alzheimer's disease and she wanted to comment on that, so we guided her on how to register and how to comment. What struck me the most was when I visited the thread at home after I got back home and read all the stories there, including what my MIL shared with them.

She said she took the diagnosis hard and she went into a depression (that I knew NOTHING about!), but gladly her doctor helped her to get into therapy where she could unload her burdens, so it helped. Now that he's been taking medication for the disease, it's helped somewhat (she said that the mornings are always so hard, but after he eats breakfast and takes his pills, he becomes "a different man" - in a good way). So that's why whenever we visit them he always looks pretty normal to me...except on two or three occasions when I saw him have trouble putting on his clothes (he looked confused on how to put them on).

Anyway, I shed some tears when I kept on reading the thread. One story that struck me was about this 97-year-old guy whose wife has been put in a nursing home 'coz Alzheimer has wiped out so many things from her brain. This guy drives his car and visits his wife regularly. He feeds her (even though she doesn't seem to recognize him anymore). His daughter died when she was 60 years old and his son died in a car accident when he was in his twenties, so he has nobody else in life.

God, I cried! Some people have such tough crosses to bear...My Mom always tells me that different people have different crosses to bear...

I'm GLAD that now my MIL has a support group to help her. As much as I want to help her, it's always MUCH better to find some people who've gone through similar problems who can really give her total understanding, support, comfort and also advice/tips.

This is one reasons I LOVE the can talk to people all over the world who've been through or who are experiencing what you're experiencing. A burden shared is a burden halved, agree?

Sending prayers for all of those people who struggle to take care of their sick family members...may God give them strength, joy, and serenity to go on...

Blessed are those who mourn,
For they shall be comforted.
- Matthew 5:4

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
- Philippians 4:11b-13


  1. I LOVE internet as well. We could know lots of news from around the world. ANd the most why I like internet because I could get extra money without living our home hi hi hi...

    I know this Alzheimer's disease from watching movies.

  2. Alzheimers is a terrible disease. I am very sorry to hear about your FIL.

    Life can be so cruel sometimes.

  3. Your MIL is a great lady for shouldering all the pain on her own. She'll be very happy when she knows you'll always be around to help her.

  4. Jul: Yep!!! :-)))

    Dog Breeds: THANK YOU for your comment. Indeed it's a terrible disease. I just hope he doesn't "regress" too fast!!!

    Blur Ting: Yeah, wish I could help out more, but we live far from her...I can only pray for her to be given all the strength and joy she needs.

  5. My father currently has Alzheimers and his mother before had the disease in late 1970s and 1980, the year she died. It's not a sudden shocking devastating death.

    But like any death or horrible disease it hurts just the same. It's basically seeing my father's strong domineering personality fade away a little each day.

  6. Vince: Oh, your Dad has it too? Sorry to hear about your Dad. Indeed it hurts to see our loved ones like that.

    I just found out that my FIL's parents also had it too and my MIL helped take care of them, too, but she said that it is MUCH harder for her that it happens on her husband.

  7. [url=][img][/img][/url]
    [b]the cheapest software, [url=]buy software online in[/url]
    [url=][/url] free service order software macromedia flash professional software
    trial educational software [url=]i buy photoshop in[/url] buy microsoft xp software
    [url=]buy software programs[/url] coreldraw thumbnail
    [url=]oem software hardware[/url] store building software
    windows vista versions [url=]quarkxpress 5[/b]