Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Random Babblings

1. On Laughter.

The best kind of laughter for me is the laughter that makes you almost pee in your pants. The kind of laughter that continues to roll and roll and roll like the waves that keep on breaking on a beach. You're dead tired, yet for some reason you just can't stop laughing. It feels good and uncomfortable at the same time. You keep on laughing while holding your stomach and your jaw is hurting and you truly want to stop, yet at the same time you're addicted to that kind of glee. That's one of the best memories I have of my parents, anyway. When they laughed together just like that! It makes me happy to see them happy. What's your best kind of laughter? What memories does your mind conjure in your head when you read the word "laughter?

2. THANKS A LOT TO Fish for this award:

3. This evening I'm going to start my first basic Finnish course. Funnily enough, the venue changed to a school nearer my apt. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!! I was a bit sad when I learnt where the venue was going to be, since it'd be about 30 minutes on foot from my apt. I sure hope I'm gonna get TONZ of homework since I need lots of practise he he he he...

4. Have you taken things too seriously? Sometimes I do that, though I don't really want to be that way. It's one trait of mine that I should continue to try to conquer.

How about second-guessing other people's words? I do that, too. Sometimes I don't know if I do that because I REALLY think I know the person very well or because I have my own issues concerning some things (or because of both reasons).

For example: the other month a friend of mine (let's just call her Bee) had complained about her gaining weight. She had never been fat and even by gaining a few kilos, she was NOT fat at all by any standard. She also told us that everybody had been telling her that she was cute, but nobody except her hubby had told her that she was beautiful. She said that being told that she was cute was a bit like being compared to a Teddy Bear.

Well, another friend of mine (let's call her Red) and I who had some issues with our weights and looks thought of her "complaints" as an alert blaring in front of us, so we tried OUR BEST to make her love herself no matter what. We just kept on teaming up to make sure that she would feel good and beautiful about herself even before she lost the weight she had gained.

You know what happened? Turned out that Bee wasn't actually having a self-confidence issue. It was just a normal complaint, nothing more. She said she wanted to lose the weight she had gained since her jeans and pants became a bit too tight for comfort. Bee didn't understand why we reacted that strongly against her complaints. She said that she didn't mind being a regular-looking girl that everybody thought of as "cute" instead of "beautiful". Only then Red and I realized that we reacted that way since we both had had issues about those things in the past.

I also don't know if I second-guess other people's motives because there's a "devil" inside me or not (by "devil", I mean the cartoonish figure of a devil and an angel sitting on different shoulders of mine). I also think that maybe sometimes I second-guess other people's motives if I think they are WAY too competitive, so when they praise me, they make me feel uncomfortable. Other than that, I also think that sometimes I do that because I know that humans (including me) are capable of having different motives rolled in one. Don't you just hate it when you're sincere about something, but then the cartoonish "devil" starts to whisper some other motive in your ear? Then you feel "tainted" and you'll end up trying to get rid of that voice. Have you ever experienced something like that?

Maybe disappointment and anger could be other factors, too. When you're disappointed and angry, you start to think cynically that other people can't possibly care enough about you, so whenever they say something, the "devil" and "angel" appear and have a debate. I hate it when it happens!!!

However, what if once in a blue moon your subconscious can truly pick up someone else's vibes strongly enough to discern the hidden motives? What if? Ummm...this is truly a rambling topic he he he...


  1. About taking things too seriously.....one thing I like about being older now is that I have learned to "chill out" about so many things that I used to take too seriously. (I hope you are familiar with the slang term "chill out").

  2. I know what you mean about trying to second guess what someone is trying to say. I do it all the time without meaning to. Now I try to force myself to take things said at face value. Only to find, people don't seem to say what they mean anyway ! Messy isn't it ? Must be worse for you with a cultural and language difference.

  3. Kathy: It'd be great to chill out about so many things. Well, I don't take things too personally as often as I did, but still I'd love to reduce it even more he he he...Glad to hear that being older helps, so I'm TRULY looking forward to it! ;-D

    Karen: Actually, I don't second-guess strangers that much (except drunken people 'coz I'd wonder if they even remember what they said or not), but mostly I second-guess those people I know. I don't know if it's because of paranoia or because I pick up some "vibe" from them. Weird. :-((((

    You're right, though. It IS messy, isn't it?

  4. I'm with Kathy - of only people would say what they mean and not bother with other motives! It would make life so easy. Kids do it, at what age do we begin to hide everything?

  5. Vic: I know what you mean. At what age do we begin to hide everything? Hmmm...this can be a new blog topic!!! ;-D Would be interesting to know what other people say. ;-D